HOPE FOR HAPPINESS

(Monday) Walking across the border I couldn't help but wonder am I in two places at one time or is this no man's land? I had my backpack on my back and my day pack on my front as I followed step by step in a single line. When we approached the wooden shack we got our stamps and crossed over the border. While waiting for a few others I decided to use the restroom. There was a restaurant across the street, and the man said I didn't have to pay. When I was done using it the girl asked for 500 Riel, but I explained I only had Dong or USD. The man started laughing hysterically asking if I needed toilet paper. I think he mistook my words. After an hour drive we arrived at Siphen and Mach's home for our home stay. I had no idea how much these next few days would impact me...
We were greeted with big smiles and snacks made of rice, coconut and bananas. Immediately I felt a sense of calmness and a great deal of happiness. Siphen and Mach's house is located in rice fields. On the property are a few houses and a small school. There's an outdoor kitchen and covered eating area in the center. A pond is set near the back and was created from a bomb crater. It's laced with fish and lily pads.

I was assigned a room in the guesthouse with Sarah while Noam and Anna were in the room across from ours. We each had our own beds and bathrooms so I was happy to stay there for the next five days. We made ourselves comfortable on the porch and read. There were a few chairs and a hammock. Cambodia is really hot so it was nice to relax and decompress. I laid in the hammock until dinner time. I could not stop reading. As the sun began setting, the cows and chickens made their way back into the barns. The bells around their necks chimed in a rhythmic manner. Another surreal moment.
Dinner was nothing less than spectacular. They prepared spring rolls, pork, rice, fried shrimp and onions and fresh fruit. We all dove right in for the mangoes. I helped myself to seconds of everything. The 15 of us (Hough joined us for a few days!) ate outside with such pleasure and enjoyment. Everyone was laughing and eating while enjoying the cool breeze even if it was coming from a mechanical fan. After dinner Siphen told us more of her family's struggle during the Khmer Rouge. One of her older brothers fled to a refugee camp and later went to America. For 10 years, her family thought he was dead. Another of her brothers had been killed during the genocide. Her story is amazing and encouraging to listen to. After the struggles and terror of the Khmer Rouge her family works hard to create a better future for Cambodia.
(Tuesday) In the middle of the night I woke up in a fit of panic. I couldn't see anything but could hear the animals and insects outside. Scrambling in my sleeping sheet I felt trapped and confused. There's only electricity when the generator is running so I forced my eyes to adjust to the darkness. When my tired mind realized where I was I went back to sleep and woke up the next morning without an alarm clock.
Breakfast included a nice spread that fueled us for the hot day. We went to Siphen's school in a truck pulled by a motorbike. It reminded me of a hayride except there was no hay and instead of a tractor there was a motorbike.

The school has gone under a few renovations and was pleasant. Even more charming were the students. The school teaches English, and we were able to interact with a few of the kids. First we went to a 9th grade classroom, but I chickened out of talking to anyone. I got so nervous and could not find words to make a conversation.
The next classroom was full of 12th graders, and I was practically forced to sit down and converse. It was a good push that I needed. I picked a row of three boys. They were very welcoming and engaging. One of them, Semae, stuck out to me. We shared stores and answered questions for almost 20 minutes. He was so enthusiastic and full of questions. His English was very good. He told me he wanted to go to a university but feared he couldn't because his family couldn't afford to send him to school. This is very common in Cambodia. Many families work in the fields and make little money. When I asked him what he did for fun he mentioned that he had no free time because of his studies. I was really inspired by him and the other students. They are eager to learn and wish for the opportunity to go to school. These kids want a better future for themselves and a chance at a career.
The most expensive university in Phnom Phen is $800 a year. After talking to Semae and later Siphen, I decided to help sponsor him. By providing grades, documents and other information, I will be able to help send him to a university and earn a degree. Talking to these kids really inspired me. I couldn't believe how much hard work and determination they have. To us this tuition is a small fee in which rent usually costs more than this. However, this is a lot of money for many people in Cambodia. Even the cheaper schools that cost several hundred dollars less are hard to afford. Siphen has offered to be the middle(wo)man and make sure everything is taken care of and both parties fulfill the agreed terms. I am really excited at the opportunity to help this kid. I normally prefer to spend my time volunteering instead of writing a check. This feels a bit different because I have had personal interactions with him. He moved me. I walked out of that classroom feeling inspired.
After our conversations we sang some songs. We tend to sing "If You're Happy and You Know It"even if we are all a bit old. Everyone got involved and clapped their hands or stomped their feet. Several rounds later, the students sang on of Cambodia's anthems. It was so beautiful. I felt as if I was daydreaming. They sang with such perfection.
When we left the classroom we headed to the library. There were many students reading in there. Books for Cambodia helps fill the room. The kids let us read some of the English translations before we head to the organic garden. The garden is ran by the Eco-Club, and the students are able to bring the fruits and vegetables home to their families. I love the skills that are taught and the opportunities that are offered outside the classroom.
The sun was so hot that we decided to have some sugarcane juice. There was a cart in which they crushed the sugarcane and drained the juice. Sometimes more sugar water is added. We drank it as is out of a plastic baggie. It was very refreshing. 

When we left the school we headed to a wat that Siphen's father had helped build. The kids followed us with curious eyes. Then we went to see a basketball game. Siphen's girls were playing a basketball tournament, and their coach is a Peace Corps. volunteer. When we pulled into the school everyone stood up and waved. It was so hot and hard to concentrate. The girls were playing in the middle of the day with clothes on underneath their uniforms. I give them a lot of credit. Despite the heat, they won!

After the game we went to the market. It was congested and filled with flies. I was intrigued by all the beautiful older women. They would stare at us while we stared back both with hungry eyes curiously observing one another. Their skin was darkened by the sun and set with crevices each telling a story. Eventually we'd awkwardly smile at one another and laugh in acknowledgment. We tried some potato patty and walked around for a bit before returning to the house.

The rest of the evening was spent in a hammock and eating. The food was unbelievable. They are spoiling us at this homestay. Of course we had seconds and even thirds for dinner. Afterward, we played some connect four. There was more reading and then it was time for bed. The generator turned off around 10:30pm, and the only sound was that of the great outdoors.

MEKONG DELTA RIDE

From our cooking class

Wood Carver in Hoi An

Cu Chi Tunnels

 (Sunday) This morning we left Saigon early. I was happy to leave. The city is overwhelming and did not leave me wanting to explore. Half of our group is also sick. We take a bus and stop at the "Happy Place"along the way. It's an area with lotus flower gardens and cafes. We primarily use it as a rest stop but take some time to walk around as well.

After another ride in the van we arrived at the Mekong Delta. There were bikes waiting for us. The weather was very hot. I lathered on some sunscreen which was SPF 30. Normally that goes against everything I believe in, but it's necessary around here. I am avoiding getting red like many others. The bike ride was beautiful. The smell of fresh floral surrounded us. There were banana leaves, tapioca plants, palm trees and flowers all around. At first I was a bit nervous and scared. We were riding along narrow paths that were full of potholes. The path was shared by motorbikes in both directions. When there's three or four feet of a path it gets a bit close for comfort.
The Mekong Delta is an extremely fertile area. The area is especially known for coconuts. We tried to stop at a few places that make coconut candy, but they were closed. Finally, we found one down the beaten path and around a corner. They had nice warm coconut candies for us to sample upon arrival. It was so decadent and chewy. It stuck to my teeth, but I didn't mind. I sampled all the flavors they had including ginger, chocolate, tea, etc. We watched the process from start to finish. It was a nice little break before heading out on our bike ride again.
About half way through our ride the path evened out, and the motorbikes lessened. The breeze felt great against the sun. We rode through rice fields and more gardens. It was the perfect afternoon. Around lunch time we took a boat to a small restaurant. The boat was loud and slow, but I passed out. When we arrived we had fresh seafood and a spread of other dishes. Of course it all tasted superb. Shortly after lunch I found my way to a hammock and took a snooze. It's so nice to enjoy a Sunday afternoon with the warmth of the sun and the cradle of a hammock.
We rode our bikes a bit longer until we came to a larger boat. It took us to our home stay for the evening. It was more of a guesthouse than anything. It was a "floating" guesthouse above beds of lilies and water. We shared our showers with geckos and  ate above the river. It was simplistic and homely. The fourteen of us were split into two rooms based on 80s and 90s kids. I swear, those 90s kids have missed out on a lot of great things :)

(Monday) We woke up bright and early to take the boat back. Along the way we passed the floating market. It was a bit slow since things tend to calm down after the new year. Then we transferred to a van to take us near the border of Cambodia. We stopped for lunch along the way and had more fresh seafood. I love all the seafood; it's so nice to have a whole fish to pick apart and enjoy. Our ride continued. I was tired and achy from being in a van for so many hours. I did manage to get a lot of reading done. I could not put down Into Thin Air. It's about the '96 Mount Everest disaster. I ended up reading it in two days because it was so good. The only time I stopped reading was when I had to. We were dropped off just outside the border where we grabbed our packs and began walking.  There were vibrant green rice fields that stretched to the far mountains. We were stamped out of Vietnam and began our walk to Cambodia.

A RIFFLE IN ONE HAND, A PLOW IN THE OTHER

(Friday) We woke up in the early morning or middle of the night, whichever you prefer. Our bus left at 4am for Da Nang. From there we would fly to Saigon or Ho Chi Minh City. It was a short one hour flight south. When we arrived we were brought to our hotel. The city is full of motorbikes. This time it is a bit scary, and Hillary had to pull the Mom Arm every once in a while to protect us. We couldn't check into our hotel yet because it was so early. Therefore, we headed for the War Remnants Museum. We walked there which took about 15-20 minutes. The sun was already hot so early in the morning.
The museum was intense and opened in 1975 as "The House for Displaying War Crimes of American Imperialism and the Puppet Government [of South Vietnam]." In Viet Nam, the war is commonly referred to as the American War. It was interesting to see it from a different perspective. What we read and saw was far more expansive than the textbooks in which we are taught. I hope no one takes offense to anything I write because I do appreciate all the services that have been fulfilled. On the outside of the museum were tanks and planes on display. I walked around for some time running my fingers across the cold metal. I was astonished with the power and weight of such machines. Just looking at them gave me the shivers. I continued walking and saw bullets and bombs bigger than my body.
A quick turn and I was walking into a prison. There was barbed wire along the bricks. The prison mostly recreates tiger cages that were used to house prisoners on Con Son Island. This island used to be lush and full of beauty. It quickly became a hellish island. Along the walls are stories of the torture that went on throughout the prisons. A knot continuously turned in my stomach as I fought back tears. I don't understand how people can be so inhumane. So many prisoners were left blind, deaf and limbless. People were beaten to death, drowned, hanged, and shocked. Many of them were not fortunate enough to die quickly. Instead they were tortured with nails, hot liquids, water, etc. I did not want to keep reading, but I could not stop. I had to hear the stories and see the pictures. Although I did not want to believe what was before my eyes, I could not deny the truth. The part that makes my heart feel the saddest is knowing that this type of behavior is common during times of war, and it is still happening. The methods seem historic and stone-age, but they're being used in countries across the globe still. Genocides are still happening and innocent people are suffering. This part of the exhibit was hard to endure.
I continued inside the building. The first thing I came across was American soldiers burning their draft cards and students protesting. There were posters displaying peaceful riots in America against the war. Following this was propaganda from dozens of other countries. They were against the American aggression in Viet Nam. This really surprised me. I had not realized how many countries were against the involvement of American. There were many powerful countries against America. The posters continued for a long time. Then there were pictures displays of the battlefields. There were face-to-face pictures of soldiers torturing prisoners, gunning down villages and bombs exploding everywhere. The pictures made it all to real. Nothing was left o the imagination as people burning alive and stumbling with lost limbs were displayed. I could not hold back my tears any longer. My heart was broken.
Perhaps the most interesting part of the display was the part devoted to Agent Orange. The extremely toxic dioxin compound was used throughout all of Viet Nam. It was produced by Monsanto (leader for genetically engineered seeds and founder of NutraSweet) and dispensed as a chemical warfare. About 20 million gallons of herbicides and defoliates were sprayed during the war. The goal of this was to demolish food supplies, clear land and deprive the guerrillas with the means of survival. The chemicals destroyed lands, lush forests and crops. However, the people suffered the most. The aftermath of this chemical is still being calculated. Still, people are suffering from Agent Orange. It is passed through DNA, a mother's milk, etc. It is sad that children born decades after the war are born with disorders and birth defects because of this inhumane act. Children are born without eyes, joined together, limbless, hernias, extra fingers, or other deformities. I saw one picture of a baby born with four triangles for lips to her mouth. The pictures were all real and recent. Again my eyes swelled with tears. Although people have recovered and the country has developed itself, there are hundreds of thousands of people still suffering. I read a letter that a girl wrote to President Obama. She was a child born without legs or a left hand due to Agent Orange. Her family is a family of farmers, and the land still carries the chemical. She was moved by Obama's letter to his daughters particularly this part:
These are the things I want for you—to grow up in a world with no limits on your dreams and no achievements beyond your reach, and to grow into compassionate, committed women who will help build that world. And I want every child to have the same chances to learn and dream and grow and thrive that you girls have.
She wrote of her desire to have the same but how difficult it was to obtain them due to her circumstances. The US has denied most aid that it has promised to Viet Nam. She was part of the plaintiffs in a lawsuit for victims of Agent Orange. However, the case was dismissed "ruling that there was no legal basis for the plaintiffs' claims." I hope her letter gets answered as well as other victims. I also hope the help that they need is given to them. It is so sad that young generations have to pay the price of the past. I had a hard time writing this blog. The words are difficult to find to describe the impact this museum had on me. I am deeply saddened. My heart says a thousand prayers.
I can't load pictures right now but here is a great site to see some of the exhibit...http://www.vietnam720.com/travel-tips/war-remnants-museum-saigon/


(Saturday) Today we took a bus to the Cu Chi tunnels. There's a network of tunnels that expand underground and were used by the Viet Cong guerrilla fighters. The tunnels were small and dark and expanded more than 250km. Often they were filled with insects and animals, but they were a great strategy. The network contained smokeless kitchens, fighting rooms and even a space to help provide collapsing tunnels if a bomb hit nearby. They were usually three tiered and had traps for American soldiers in case they found themselves inside. 
While walking the site we saw craters formed by bombs. Some were larger than others, but it was interesting to see the impact it made on such hard earth. There was a small rectangular cut out that was camouflaged with leaves. We were able to lower ourselves into it if we desired. The rectangle was so small, I did not think I could squeeze in. I tried and succeeded. It was scary. I made sure no one was going to step on the lid or cover me with dirt while I was in the tunnel. These were brilliantly made with such simple tools. We walked some more and were able to see sample rooms and how tools were made. 
There was also a shooting range with six or seven rifles that were used during the war. I really wanted to shoot because I have never had the opportunity to. Anna, Luke, Madeleine and I decided to shoot the M-16 which was used by American soldiers during the war. The front was mounted, but the pressure of the gun was still heavy. I was scared. I didn't like wrapping my finger around the trigger. In fact, I pulled away the first time. Then I pretended to aim and shot the bullet into the field. The force was so great, and my shoulder flew back a bit. I did this two more times. I didn't like the feeling of having a killing machine in my hands. I wanted to experience the weight, the sound, the feeling. It is nothing I care to feel again.
 We continued to walk. Hillary told us more than our guide did. He was very nice but extremely timid. Those who wanted were able to climb into a tunnel and walk a certain length of it. I did a part of the walk. The tunnel was small despite it being enlarged for tourists. We had to squat the whole time. There were a few lights inside, but at time I could not see the person one foot in front of me. A panic ran over me as I reached to feel some sort of clothing. There we were, underground, in a small tunnel with no light. I am not sure how people lived and survived like this. Although brilliant in design, they are so far from comforting. After the tour we had some cassava and tea. The rest of the afternoon and evening was mostly spent lazily. Tomorrow we go to the Mekong Delta for some cycling and a homestay. After that we head to Takeo, Cambodia for another homestay. Here we will be doing volunteer work and building houses and toilets. No communication will be available!  

Sample of Tunnels

Hole we slid into

I did this too. Such a small rectangle

 The pictures were copied from these sites respectively:
 http://revolutionaryfrontlines.files.wordpress.com/2010/03/vietnam-cu-chi-tunnels.jpg
http://www.humenz.com/photos/d/5424-2/Cu+Chi+Tunnels.jpg
http://www.indochinaodysseytours.com/vietnam/ho-chi-minh-city/images/cu-chi-tunnels_1.jpg

A BIT OF ROMANCE

(Tuesday) We have left Hue for Hoi An. On our ride there we stop at Marble Mountain just outside of Da Nang. It was also used as a hospital but does not have an internal structure like the first one we saw. Instead, many of the caves are homes to statues and sites of worship. There was even a monk meditating on a rock.

I've anticipated coming to Hoi An since this town is one of Southeast Asia's oldest silk ports. There are tailors every where you turn. It's the best place to have clothes made. The town is absolutely romantic. The buildings have a French influence and glow with beauty. Some expose bricks beneath the tethered surface. The soft hues of yellow, orange and red line the streets and glow in the dim lights of the silk lanterns. The river houses many small wooden boats. Restaurants and shops are sprawled along the river. Each extends a warm invitation. There are street carts and a bridge to cross the river. Along the bridge are more silk lanterns that lead to more restaurants and shops.
Many of us had lunch together before heading over to Hillary's friend to have clothes made. Many of us bought sarongs in villages throughout Thailand and Laos to have made into clothes here. I had three gorgeous sarongs as well as some other ideas for dresses. One sarong was bright green so I had it made into a simple A-line skirt. The rest of the fabric was used to be made into two small clutches. Another sarong was made into a one-should dress. I absolutely love it despite the alternative neckline. I wanted a straight line, but it was made into more of a curve. Oh well! The last sarong was made into a beautiful strapless cocktail dress. The colors are so bold! The dress fits my body like a glove, and it is spectacular! She did such a good job with these! I also had two green dresses made. One was chiffon and open backed while the other was a silk wrap dress. The chiffon is not my favorite and something must be done with the front, but the back is exactly as I wanted. The silk one is nice and can be great with the right pair of heels!  Either way, the work that went into the dresses was tremendous.
After my first fitting, I decided to get a massage. I thought I was paying for an Aroma Therapy Massage. Instead I received a Vietnamese lady straddling me and drowning me in oil. The only benefit of the massage was having my back cracked.

These were all made in Hoi An

Also made in Hoi An

In the evening Isabel, Madeleine, Sam and I walked around. We found a woman selling some small snacks from a basket. We tried a few samples and bought some treats. She had coconut shavings in powdered sugar that reminded me of a marshmallow. I miss marshmallows so much! We also purchased some banana chips because they were not as sweet as normal banana chips. They were good. Isabel and I were craving some street food so we wandered the streets. Before crossing the bridge we got some grilled corn. The woman covered it in a chili sauce before putting it on the grill again. The flavor was sweet and salty despite the overcooked texture. We crossed the river searching for more Bahn Myu. Isabel asked a lady selling jewelry and she pointed to the left. After a few minutes of wandering we saw a street stand with a little old lady. The both of us ordered a sandwich and walked around. It was the best sandwich I have ever had! The flavors were so intense and luscious. There was a mixture of herbs and spices, sweet chili sauce, meets and vegetables on a warm baguette. We tried to find some Bahn Boa but could only find White Rose. The Bahn Myu was so good that we ended up going back for seconds. The lady was so nice!!! For dessert we went to a restaurant along the river. Everything looked amazing. After going back-and-forth several times, we settled on some Chocolate Cheesecake. Although it did not taste like cheesecake, it melted in our mouths. The dessert was delectable. Off to bed after this.

(Wednesday) Today was a free day. We enjoyed breakfast on the terrace by the pool and fields. It was a great way to start the day. There was a nice spread with fresh fruits, baguettes, freshly made eggs, pancakes, meats, etc. Of course there was drip coffee with sweet milk, my favorite. After breakfast a few of us rented bikes. Although they were old, they functioned just fine. We filled the baskets in the front with fresh fruits and sandwiches that we got at the market that morning. The market was intense and crowded. There was such a variety of products. We decided to get local fruits and of course Bahn Myu. Then we rode to the beach. The path was straight. At times we passed through villages, but my favorite part was riding through the rice fields. The colors were intense. The green rice fields contrasted against the blue sky. There were no clouds today only sunshine. Finally, after 10 days the sun decided to play.
The beach we went to was further away from town and therefore less crowded. We laid our sarongs along the sand and soaked up the sun. The water was the perfect temperature. A few of us ran in and savored the taste of salt water against our lips. "We are swimming in the Red China Sea!" I proclaimed. It felt so good to say these words. We all said it a few times to remind ourselves where we were. A surreal moment. The afternoon was lovely.
In the late afternoon, I rode back by myself. I did not mind; in fact, I enjoyed it. The sun was still warm and the breeze was cool. My mind wandered to the rice fields and the people along the streets. The ride was pleasant as I felt a sense of calmness. A cold shower followed before I was off to get sized for my dresses. 
Tonight for dinner, Isabel, Anna, Sam and I signed up for a Vietnamese cooking class. We were joined by three other travelers. The food was scrumptious, but the cooking class was more a prep class than anything. It was mildly disappointing especially in comparison to the one we took in Thailand. The head chef went over the recipes we were "cooking." First we did a fish cooked in a banana leaf. For that, each of us minced a different vegetable or herb. Then, myself and one other guy pounded the ingredients together to release some of the juices. She said I was stronger than him, but I like to think I just know what I'm doing in the kitchen. We were given small cutting boards and a steak knife. What chef cuts with a steak knife? It's almost a mockery to be given such useless tools. Anyways, she then put the fish on the banana leaves and showed us how to fold it properly. Her assistants came and took it away to be cooked.
The rest of the meals were done in a similar fashion. We grated vegetables, watched a bit, then her assistants took it away. The good news is, we had a great dinner. It included spring rolls which we were all able to roll one ourselves. There was also the fish, white rose (local dumplings), fried wontons (also a local specialty) and my favorite, beef salad. Of course I loved the beef salad because the meat was marinated in garlic, and the dressing also had a lot of garlic. Again, the food was good, but the class was not. Off to bed in yet another food coma.

(Thursday) Today is another free day in Hoi An. After breakfast, I walked around the town by myself. I walked with a stupid smile across my face saying, "Hi" to everyone I passed. I was not bothered by women trying to make me clothes or someone offering a manicure for 50 cents. In this town, I simply walk and smile politely. A few times I stop and talk. Some people ask where I am from or how my travels are going. Today, I am on my own schedule and find the time for simple conversations and exchanges of laughter. At one point I see a merchant carving away at some teak wood. I stop and watch him with his permission. His English is fairly good, and we talk for 10 or 15 minutes as I marvel over his work. He is so skilled. He has carved such beautiful things like Buddhas, chop sticks and jewelry boxes. I continue on enjoying the sun and small chatter of others.
I had two more dresses made that turned out to be my favorites. They're fun dresses that I want to wear to the Country Music Fest. I immediately thought about that when I saw them on the manikin. I also had a gorgeous cocktail dress made at a third store. It's perfect for a date night whenever I will actually have one again ;) Isabel and I rent bikes and ride to the beach again. The weather is perfect. I love the darkening of my skin and the company of my book. I laid on my sarong listening to the undertow crashing and reading A Thousand Splendid Suns. A sense of tranquility overcomes me. I've been reading quite a bit this trip. So far I have read Little Bee about a Nigerian refugee, First They Killed My Father a memoir about a Cambodian refugee, A Thousand Splendid Suns about a bastard Afghan child and Are You There Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea a humorous book about a comedian's life. The first three were amazing. I recommend them to be added to anyone's reading list. They were very moving and formed on actual events.
This is a side note, but yesterday on the beach I bought a pair of sunglasses. I had left my black ones on the bus back in Thailand. Since then I have purchased a pair of neon green ones. I love them but sometimes the green is overkill. I thought I should get some black shades so people can take me seriously at times. Within 24 hours I had dropped my new shades and broken them. I just bought another new pair (don't worry they're less than $5) and they are chipped. I see a trend here...
 For dinner we all met by the pool. Each of us brought a snack to share. Those of us who had clothes made wore them. Everyone's items turned out great! We leave Hoi An in the middle of the night. I will be sad to go. This town is so romantic. The reflections in the water, the silk lanterns, the food and the people are all serene. The architecture is full of character. One can't help but be happy here. There's too much to enjoy and such a slow pace to do so. This has been my favorite town thus far. Perhaps one day I will return.